Reality Check

What is real and what is not... sometimes I get confused. No, I'm not a schizophrenic. But I feel like one though, occasionally.

The truth is based on the person's perception. So if I pretend very hard that something does not exist, does it make it non-existent? Or vice versa. But it's still (not) there, isn't it?

The mind tends to play tricks on us. A part of the human defense mechanism. When something hurts so bad, subconsciously and automatically, we'd try to cushion the blow by telling ourselves encouraging words and subtly changing scenarios in our heads. Words and actions that would soothe our dented pride and ego. That's all well and fine at the beginning but what becomes when you get carried away and continue to live in denial and the suppression of a memory? That's not real, is it? Living in pretenses, in a lie...

I watched Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind (starring Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet; written by Charlie Kaufman) the other night (it's a bloody brilliant movie, btw.) To quote the Astro guide, it is a movie about "break-ups, breakdowns and breakthroughs." The plot was basically about erasing painful memories to enable the clients to move on with their lives. The illusion of a painless life. But once the truth is out, it's crash landing and back to square one, innit? The movie is much more than that but I shan't spoil it for you all. Go watch it. ;)



So, again... what is the truth? How does a person get back to living in reality when he/she isn't sure what reality is? Such doubts could really drive one crazy if one really thinks about it. I want to see the light. I want to deal with the truth. Wait. Am I not doing that already? Or maybe I think I'm doing that already but actually I'm not? Or maybe we are all living in The Matrix… :P God, I'm so confused.

"Be grateful for your scars, Will, for our scars have the power to remind us that the past was real." – Hannibal Lecter, Red Dragon

That's food for thought.